everything is gonna be all right

everything is gonna be all right

last night I am struggling to sleep. I have my CPAP on, but I am feeling uncomfortable. I am stressed. I worry about the finances, how I am going to pay for everything. What will happen to our little family of me and my partner? I succumbed to a few cigarettes and will I be turned away on the day of the op when they test for smoking? I have stopped smoking, really I have, since 1 January. Never thought I would, but when one has to, one has to.

And will everything work out fine? And this pre-op diet, how does it exactly work? The diet I received from the dietician is full of info and this and that and here and there and everything is going around and around in my head.

Will I be healthy?

Will I be ok?

Will I live?

Won’t I die? I know I won’t. But really, really, won’t I?

And then suddenly, through the window (only open ajar) comes the praying mantis and sits on my inner left arm, and looks me straight in the eye.

And there he sits, the whole night. Next to me. Just sitting around, praying. Bringing me a message of peace.

The praying mantis is the oldest symbol of God: the African Bushman’s manifestation of God come to Earth, “the voice of the infinite in the small,” a divine messenger.

The mantis comes to us when we need peace, quiet and calm in our lives.

I think everything might just be ok.

Tomorrow only THREE WEEKS LEFT!!


4 thoughts on “everything is gonna be all right

    • I know that there is loads to worry about, and i have heard of lots of people having complications, i know that doesn’t help by me mentioning it. But you need to just know that you will be perfectly fine. Your surgeon is one of the best in the country and has an amazing record of successes.
      I must say the only time i ever thought, OMG this is really happening was when the Anesthetist, started injecting me with the good stuff. after that, lights out, and woke up in recovery, with my wife, and mother, holding my hand.
      Do your research and speak to people, and you will feel more and more confident. I am going on 3 weeks and have zero pain, lost almost 12kgs and feel fantastic.
      You can do this. and you will be so happy with the results.

      • Thank you so very very much for this message. You have no idea how much these words mean to me.

        I am extremely stressed, and feel much better after reading this. Well done on your weightloss, that is remarkable!

        Please stay in touch.

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