first obstacle – telling one’s mother…

i love my mum. she is AWESOME. she is the BEST mother for me. and i am so blessed that i got to be hers.

things were rocky when i was a teenager. we are very similar. hard-headed women. and much too clever, and glib. very much so. so imagine the teenage tantrum stage. my poor mum. i thought she was crazy, and i told her so as well. how horrible is that? she probably thought i was crazy too. don’t blame her if she did. i guess i am 😉

anyway. luckily i’ve grown up, and quite early on i realised how EXTREMELY blessed i am with my parents and my brother. we truly have a great family, we are all very close, and we love each other deeply. and don’t ever really fight. we have fun together, and laugh, and are always excited to see each other.

and in this all – herein lies my first obstacle.

telling my mum i’ve decided to have bariatric surgery.

she is going to flip. i am 100% sure of it.

and how can i be so sure? because a friend of hers’ daughter had this surgery done about 10 years ago. and currently she is very sick and struggling a lot, in and out of hospitals and almost died. and obviously mum doesn’t want that to be my fate.

when she told me about this women’s problems a few months ago, she was reiterating – how BAD this operation is and it is SO DANGEROUS and she doesn’t understand how anyone can do it to themselves.

she can be a bit of a drama queen (like mother like daughter)… and i know her well enough she was going on like this to dispel any notions i might have of getting it myself. although i’ve never told her i’m considering it even. i think she knows me well enough.

so yeah. tonight i have to face the music and tell her.

and honestly i just don’t have the strength to weather this storm. of convincing her. of butting heads about this. i am in turmoil enough as it is.

i’ve done my research and i have decided to take this chance. cause at least i HAVE a chance on life this way. if i don’t – i have NO CHANCE. no chance whatsoever. the time of building pies in the sky is over. there won’t ever be a “one day when i lose the weight i’ll…”.

because it won’t happen. it hasnt happen in 15 years. in fact, it has just gotten worse and worse.

so that is what i will have to make her understand.

wish me luck.

 

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